A lot of parents can say that the toughest years of raising a child is when they are born and when they grow up in their teenage years. It is a huge challenge for parents to understand and be on the same page with their teens. Now that they know what independence and being confident is like, they can now control what they should feel and decide on their own. Thus, they tend to not listen to you anymore and their opinion matters to them most now. The teenage years can be tough, but parents can turn that thing around and make it fun if they know how to handle and approach the situation well.
If you notice your teenager does not listen to you anymore, here are some approaches and tips that you can do to them:
Do not point at your teenager
Parents, when they get frustrated at their children, tend to point their fingers at their teenagers when something goes wrong. As parents, you need to be a role model for your children. If you see that the dishes aren't washed or if the trash has not been out, don't yell at them immediately. Instead, be calm and show them how it should be done for them to do the next time around. Prevent pointing your finger in their direction when you are feeling mad or frustrated because they will either learn how to fight back to you, which will become worse in the future.
Slow the pacing down
Teenagers tend to be very impulsive especially when it comes to decision-making. When they come up to you with something that they feel like they need to decide real quick, take time to sit down with them and talk about the conversation slowly. You can always say you need time to think about it and you can get back to them later. It's important to teach teens the importance of space and time to think before making a decision for them to thoroughly think about it.
Avoid arguments between you and your teen
To some parents, they might think arguments between them and their teen is normal. It may somehow sound true but it would be better to say "misunderstandings" rather than arguments. If your teen came home late from a party, you don't necessarily need to yell at them. Verbal should be turned into visual where your teen can still get the memo that they did something bad. Instead of yelling at them, you can always let your palm out directing to her room while avoiding eye contact. A visual message prevents arguments that may cause a more drastic scene in your household.
Control the issue as much as you can
Since they are still growing into young adults, control can be hard for them to do. Let them realize that you are not swapping responsibilities for them to do instead of you. Instead of saying that they should clean their room, it is more effective to tell them that you will only enter their room if it's neat and tidy. You can divert telling them what they should do to what you will do.
Bring authority around
If you notice that your teen tends to listen more to their aunt or uncle or other relatives, you can get them in a conversation with you. You can always say that if they were to talk to their aunt or uncle about it, they would probably also do the same thing. This will make it easier for your teen to get the message in their head.
