Parents can probably relate when we say that sometimes secrets bother them. The thought that their kids are keeping something from them is disturbing them a lot. It is perhaps an instinct that parents have.
However, no matter how much convincing parents do, it still is challenging to let children tell them everything. As parents, what could be more worrying is that the information or thing that a kid could be keeping as a secret is harmful to them.
For experts, there is a thin line between the secrets that parents should know, and the secrets children should keep from their parents.
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The secrets that children could keep from their parents.
A surprise party for the parents.
Of course, to make this a successful surprise party, the kids would need to keep this a secret. For as long as the party is intended for parents, then it is okay to keep it a secret.
Games that don't break any safety rules.
Kids enjoy some games at their specific ages. These types of games can be kept as a secret as long as it is not harmful, it does not involve doing bad things to others, and it does not leave out other kids. If the game is only aimed at creating fun, they were then keeping it as a secret is okay.
Gossips about others.
If this gossip does not bother a child, then there is no need for the adults to know about it. However, if this gossip bothers a kid, then he or she should be advised to share it with an adult whom he or she trusts.
The secrets that kids should not keep from their parents.
According to the VeryWell Family, there are dangerous secrets that parents should look at all the time. These secrets are the ones that could pose a danger to children. An example is when perpetrators of sexual harassment are using "secrets" to get away with what they did. They tend to tell their victims that what happened is a secret that no one else should know.
Other secrets that kids should not keep from their parents are:
Things about other people and their private areas.
This topic should already be alarming to parents because this can lead to other topics which may not be suitable for children.
An idea, a thought, or event that bothers a child.
Anything that bothers a child is perhaps something that they would want to discuss with an adult.
Dangerous games.
Even if games could entail fun, there are some that may raise the red flags, especially if these games are hurting other kids or are encouraging disagreement.
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What should parents do about secrets?
Now, it is established that there are things that children can keep as a secret and there are some that require intervention from parents. Yet, it does not stop there. Parents have the responsibility to explain to their children the importance of the difference between the two.
Aside from these, parents should also teach children about privacy and confidentiality.
