For sure, being a father is an achievement on its own, but being successful as a father is another thing. Happy dad Stuart Heritage from The Guardian shares a secret: "Get some starter parents."
"I still don't really know what I'm doing. I'm trying my best, but my best basically amounts to a series of fumbled lunges in the dark," Heritage said. "I am pin-the-tail-on-the-donkeying my way through fatherhood."
Having recently discovered the benefits, he advises all new or would-be parents to "get some starter parents." Starter parents are parents who are exactly three months ahead of new or would-be ones. Meaning, if a mom is three months pregnant, a starter parent for her would be a mom who's six months pregnant.
Heritage said that the earlier a starter parent is found, the better. "If you've just had a baby, locate the first three-month-old you can find and cozy up to its parents at all costs," he added.
Starter parents provide a lot of comfort and help to new parents, even up to 10 times easier, Heritage said. Chosen wisely, they can give good advice, moral support, a good "sounding board," some child-development inputs, and even clothes that aren't used anymore. "The list goes on," he added.
Having starter parents also means having someone to ask regarding what to watch out for; learning by listening to other parents share what they go through with their own kid; and have community; while being enabled to receive a lot of advice and hand-me-downs, as baby clothes, Heritage said, grow in three-month increments.
According to the New Dads Survival Guide, when babies reach their 13th week of age, they are expected to have outgrown their first baby clothes.
"Time it right and you'll never have to go shopping again," Heritage explained.
Also, working on your relationship with starter parents might entitle you to receive old essential help items for free, like a baby hammock, which enables both the baby and the parents to sleep well.
"Until now, we've had to spend every evening on our feet, accompanied by nothing but the sound of our vertebrae grinding away into nothing, until he finally dozed off. But their son had grown out of the hammock and they had no room for it," he said. "These people have no idea, but that little gesture has saved our lives."
Based on his experience, it does help to have starter parents. For new and upcoming dads out there, better find your own, to help you start easy.
Read more: Pregnancy Tips & Tricks for Dads
