A 38-year-old virgin mom from the U.K. shared how she gave birth to a daughter, her mini-me, despite never having any sexual experience in her life.
Kimberley Godsall told Daily Mail that she gets a lot of comments from her friends about her immaculate conception, but she's not offended by the jokes. She sees the humor in her situation and feels proud that she was able to have a child despite remaining a virgin mom.
Godsall, who works as an exam tutor, had her baby, Scarlett, in 2019 following a two-year process of selecting a sperm donor and undergoing artificial insemination at the Care Fertility Clinic. She chose a Caucasian American sperm donor with blue eyes and reddish-brown hair through the online services of a sperm bank in Denmark.
However, before her procedure, Godsall had a series of consultations with her doctor since she is a virgin. They assured her that most of her concerns about conceiving without having sex would be psychological rather than physical reactions.
Why the Virgin Mom Never Had Sex
Godsall admits that she is not a religious person, but she values "saving herself" for the man she eventually marries. She had two boyfriends at different stages of her life, but her relationships with these men didn't last for three months.
She also longed to be a mother for as far as she could remember. She said that having a child is one of her lifelong dreams.
When she was in her early 30s, Godsall knew that her biological clock was ticking as the man of her dreams had yet to enter her life. So, she decided to take charge of her fate by going the unusual route of using a sperm donor for intrauterine insemination.
But its financial cost was nothing compared to the traumatic experience Godsall had to go through to have a baby. Since she has not experienced sex and saw an OBGYN only once in her life, Godsall admitted that whatever procedures the fertility doctors had to do with her vagina felt strange and painful.
The virgin mom had to go through more than one IVF procedure before finally learning that she was pregnant. Godsall said that while her pregnancy was smooth-sailing, the actual labor and delivery was another painful experience.
Despite this, Godsall felt everything was worth it after seeing Scarlett in the flesh. She still has a frozen second embryo in the clinic, but she wants to focus on her daughter for now.
Virgin Moms Pursuing Motherhood
However, the virgin mom is not the only woman who had chosen to turn to science, instead of the conventional methods, to have a baby. Dr. Maha Ragunath of the Care Fertility Clinic said there is a marked increase in the number of women going this route, especially from busy career women who want to pursue motherhood but have no time for a romantic life. Ragunath also said that while these women have never had many opportunities to explore their dating life and sexuality, they are "mentally prepared" and well-balanced to embrace parenthood.
Dr. Piave Lake, a mental health expert from the American Society for Reproductive Medicine, said that women have the right to choose how they want to have kids, especially if they have the access and the means. Lake has spoken with a lot of would-be parents seeking a sperm or egg donor, and she understands fertility clinics have therapists who discuss the issue of IVF thoroughly with women who do not want to have sex.
Meanwhile, Godsall admitted that she does wonder about what having sex feels like and if she's missing out on something. Her decision, however, feels right for her than having a baby with the wrong person.
"The fact I have my little girl is far more important to me than any of that," the proud virgin mom said.