How Does Infidelity Impacts Children's Mental and Emotional Health?

Infidelity is the act of having a romantic or sexual relationship with someone aside from one's partner, whether husband or wife.

Everyone in the family will most likely be affected by an affair. The parents who were cheated on will feel mad, and upset, and can experience mixed emotions whereas the cheating partner might feel guilty. However, these emotions are big ones, especially for children.

Ending the relationship might be the first thing parents would think of. However, the child's needs must come first and parents must bear in mind what their roles are in the family. Sometimes, a family who experienced infidelity does not mind what the child is feeling or experiencing as what they think of is themselves and how can they cope with the cheating issue.

According to Kimberly Friedmutter, the author of the best-selling book Subconscious Power: Use Your Inner Mind to Create the Life You've Always Wanted, kids whose parents undergo infidelity felt abandonment and so they will pull away from the cheating parent and will trust or love more the staying parent. Children understand cheating as a way of leaving them and not just the family. They will also no longer trust the cheating parent.

Kids will try to understand what is happening inside the house. They will assume that the responsibility is on them as they are smart and they notice changes in their parent's behavior and if they see them as mad or sad, it will have an extreme effect on them. Dori Shwirtz, a marital and family mediator at Divorce Harmony, said that when kids see their parents feeling down, they will help their parents to smile again as they assume that it is their responsibility to make their parents happy and they will focus more on helping their parents get through during tough times, per Romper.

Effects of separation and infidelity on the children

Children normally experience pressure as they think they would become the protector of the parent who got cheated on which is associated with the kid's emotional stress. Kids would feel shame, mistrust, confusion, resentment, and withdrawal from the cheating parent.

Such impacts can manifest in children regardless of their age. They may act out or would stay away from the cheating parent as the parent-child relationship will be the most affected aside from the relationship of the spouse.

Some studies determined that the young ones will face challenges and obstacles in trusting others, especially in terms of romantic relationships. Such infidelity they have witnessed when they were still a child can play an important role in their future relationship as they would not easily trust others and would think it would also happen to them.

According to Separation, if a parent finds themselves in a situation where the spouse has been unfaithful, giving your child the support and attention he needs will help to reinforce feelings of both security and love.

Prioritizing the necessities of the children

According to Jennifer Harley Chalmers, Ph.D., one of the authors of Surviving an Affair, one of the things children learn when one of their parents became unfaithful is the thoughtlessness or doing everything regardless of how it brings impacts, other people.

In 2012, a quarter section of US adults aged under 45 were children of divorce which only means that millions of people in the US are struggling with the residue of divorce in their lives.

According to KindredMedia Org, divorce gives a big and lasting impact on the children and it can affect their personality, ability to trust, their views towards relationships, and their ability to cope with such changes.