How to be an Excellent Parent? Experts Say to be a Good Listener

Family
Charles McArthur

According to Parenting for Brain, a good parent is someone who does everything for the sake of their child. Thus, being a great parent can not only be defined by the action but the intention.

Laurence Steinberg, professor of psychology at Temple University in Philadelphia, stated that effective parenting helps children to nurture compassion, kindness, and self-reliance. Such also protects children from any mental health issues and disorders.

Kid Health says that children began their development of senses when they are babies as they see themselves through their parents' eyes. Thus, the tone of voice and expression are all absorbed by the kids. Moreover, the words and actions that signify negativity would affect the entire development of the child, especially the kid's self-esteem.

Steinberg says that many parents hit their children which usually resulted in kids having low self-esteem. The psychology professor claims that under no circumstances parents doesn't have the right to hit their children as it will only give a huge impact on the child, not even a slap on a kid's bottom.

Furthermore, Ruby Natale Ph.D., PsyD, professor of clinical pediatrics at the University of Miami Medical School said that she couldn't agree more as many parents use such harsh parenting because their parents used the same tactics. Implementing such would also damage the parent-child relationship which will not make a parent an excellent one.

Understanding parents as a good listener

According to studies on listening skills, parents can display their good listening behavior towards their children when looking at their eyes as it shows to children that you are paying attention and is willing to stop from what they are doing and focus on what the children have to say.

Family Education states that parents play a vital role in establishing children's communication skills as they spend most of their time with their parents than other adults. Parents who pay attention and listen well to their children makes them encouraged to share a lot as they feel important. If kids feel their thoughts are important, they will just share without any invitation given to them such as asking how was the school or any questions that can be treated as an invitation.

Jane Nelsen, Ed.D., a licensed marriage, family, and child therapist and author or coauthor of 12 books on parenting, which includes the Positive Discipline Series, says that parents must know to let go of their children and let them do things independently for parents to become effective or an excellent one.

What are the things that make parents great?

According to Lawrence Cohen, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and author of Playful Parenting, great parents are those who find time for fun as they believe that time with children must not only be spent on meals or academics but also the fun ones. Children can clearly envision the happy moments they have spent with their parents. However, this doesn't mean that parents must entertain their children all day long but to find a time to have fun with their kids.

Ron Taffel, Ph.D., therapist, and author of The Second Family: How Adolescent Power is Challenging the American Family says that parents will know they are effective if they are firm, know how to say no, and has rules set on their children. Effective parents are the ones who do not get easily swayed by what their child wants but rather follow the rules they have set in the household.

According to Psychology Today, being a perfect parent is impossible to achieve but listening, showing support to your kids, and building a family that secures and provides what a child needs are ways to help kids to feel loved.

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