Helicopter parenting was once believed to be the only way to raise children.
Families employ different parenting styles. Parenting styles around the world are different and can vary from one another. Numerous factors, such as culture, religion, beliefs, and environment, usually influence it.
As time progressed and numerous research and studies were done on helicopter parenting, it had its caveats.
Unfortunately, the caveats of helicopter parenting lean more toward the negatives rather than bringing positive outcomes.
What is Helicopter Parenting?
Helicopter parenting is a style where parents are highly involved in every aspect of their child's life and constantly hover over them to monitor their activities and experiences.
According to Parents, the term "helicopter parent" was coined by teenagers who described their parents as following them around like a helicopter in Dr. Haim Ginott's book Between Parent and Teenager, published 1969.
At this point, parents frequently assume excessive responsibility for their children's experiences and, more specifically, for their achievements or shortcomings.
It refers to being overly involved in a child's life in a manner that is excessively controlling, overprotective, and perfecting; in other words, it goes beyond the bounds of what is considered responsible parenting.
The negative effects of helicopter parenting
While the intentions behind helicopter parenting are often positive, such as wanting to ensure their child's safety and success, it can have adverse effects on the child's development.
Children who helicopter parents raise may lack independence in the long run. Children raised in this style may have difficulty making decisions, taking the initiative, and solving problems independently.
Because consistent pressure and monitoring can lead to increased stress and anxiety levels, children may also be more likely to struggle with these mental health conditions than adults.
Furthermore, helicopter parenting means controlling what your children do so that they might lack resilience. Children who have had their mistakes and failures corrected or prevented by their parents may struggle to cope when they encounter challenges in the future.
Parenting in kindness
Esther Wojcicki, a journalist and parenting expert, recommends families parent their children with kindness.
According to CNBC, when her daughters were younger, she placed a strong emphasis on instilling in them the value of kindness. Her three children have all gone on to successful careers; two are CEOs, and one is a pediatrician.
According to Wojcicki, Susan is the Chief Executive Officer of YouTube, Janet is a Professor of Pediatrics, and Anne is the Co-Founder and Chief Executive Officer of the Company 23andMe, which specializes in Genetics and Health.
She went on to say that her children were not motivated by wealth or fame but rather by the desire to make a positive impact on the lives of others.
She added that Susan believed that being compassionate meant being more attentive to the needs of her staff.
She assisted in the establishment of a childcare service. She knew that reassuring parents that their children were in capable hands would make them feel more at ease and improve their performance.
To be nice, in Janet's eyes, meant lending a hand to parents so they could raise healthy, robust children who developed good eating habits.
And for Anne, being nice meant assisting others in better understanding their own genes so they could have greater control over their health.
For parents who want to practice kindness in raising their children, here are several ways you can do it, as recommended by KidsHealth:
- Active listening: Encourage open communication by listening to your child's thoughts, feelings, and perspectives.
- Encouragement and praise: Offer positive feedback and encouragement to help build your child's confidence and self-esteem.
- Respect: Treat your child with respect and dignity, even in challenging situations. Avoid using sarcasm or belittling language.
- Empathy: Put yourself in your child's shoes to understand their perspective and show compassion towards their feelings.
- Flexibility: Be open to compromise and be willing to adjust your expectations to meet the needs of your child.
- Quality time: Spending quality one-on-one time with your child can strengthen your relationship and promote a sense of security and attachment.
- Limit discipline: Use discipline as a last resort and opt for more positive reinforcement methods.
