Navigating Discussions on Shootings with Children: A Detailed Guide Tailored to Different Age Groups

By Telita Montales , Parent Herald Jun 27, 11:20 am

Photo: (Photo : Element5 Digital on Unsplash)

In an era where news travels faster than the speed of light, shielding children from distressing topics such as shootings can be challenging. However, this doesn't mean we should shy away from these discussions. Instead, we must approach them with sensitivity, adjusting our narrative to match their level of understanding and emotional maturity. Here is an age-appropriate guide to navigating such discussions.

How to Talk To Your Kids About Shooting Based on Their Age

Preschoolers (3 to 5 years)

At this age, children's awareness of the world around them is growing. Still, it is essential to protect their innocence. You should limit exposure to graphic news content and be there to answer questions if they do come across distressing news.

If the topic does come up, use simple, reassuring language. Assure them that their home and school are safe places. Reinforce the idea of community helpers like police officers, who are there to protect everyone. Remember, your primary goal is to foster a sense of security.

Elementary Schoolers (6 to 10 years)

Elementary-aged children are more observant and likely to hear about shootings from school or the media. Rather than avoiding the topic, guide the conversation to foster their understanding.

Use age-appropriate language to explain what happened. Ask them about their feelings and validate them. Make sure to address their fears honestly but reassuringly. Let them know that while such events are scary and sad, they are also rare.

Middle Schoolers (11-13 years)

This group, being more informed, requires a more open and direct approach. They may be more impacted by the fear and anxiety associated with such events.

Encourage them to express their feelings and thoughts. They might have strong opinions or solutions, and it's important to listen and engage in a respectful conversation. Clarify any misconceptions, provide factual information, and discuss the importance of empathy and kindness in society.

High Schoolers (14 to 18 years)

High schoolers have a broader perspective of the world, and they can handle complex discussions about violence and society's role in preventing it.

Encourage them to critically analyze news sources and consider multiple perspectives. According to Today, this is also an opportunity to discuss their role as informed citizens and how they can contribute to creating safer communities.

Important Things to Remember When Teaching about Shooting

Regardless of the age group, remember these key points:

Start the conversation: If they're aware of the event, it's better for them to hear about it from a trusted adult who can provide context and comfort.
Validate their feelings: It's normal to feel scared, confused, or angry. Let them know their feelings are valid and that it's okay to share them.
Reassure them: Remind them that many people are working to keep them safe and that such incidents, while scary, are relatively rare.

As we navigate these discussions with our children, our goal is to help them understand, process, and deal with the complexities of the world around them in a way that is appropriate for their age and developmental level. This enables them to grow into informed, empathetic, and resilient individuals.