In the age of social media, the language of therapy has become increasingly prevalent in online discussions of mental health. However, recent text message revelations between surfer and model Sarah Brady and actor Jonah Hill have shed light on the potential misuses and harms of what some are calling "therapy speak" in relationships.
Unpacking the Misuse of "Therapy Speak": Jonah Hill's Texts Ignite Debate on Manipulation in Relationships
"Therapy speak," characterized by the use of psychology jargon and terms like "gaslighting," "narcissism," and "boundaries," has gained popularity as people seek to articulate their emotions and experiences. While it has provided a valuable vocabulary for some, in cases like the text messages shared by Brady, it can be wielded to manipulate and control others.
Israa Nasir, a therapist and mental health educator, explained that using jargon in everyday conversations can inadvertently shift power dynamics. There is often a moralistic virtue-signaling aspect where one person claims emotional maturity and attempts to impose their perspective on the other. Nasir stated, "I'm telling you that you are harming me in this way."
According to NBC News, Brady took to Instagram to share screenshots of alleged conversations with Hill, where he asked her to remove certain photos and referenced his "boundaries" multiple times. These messages prompted Brady to accuse Hill of being an "emotionally abusive partner." However, NBC News has not confirmed the veracity of the text messages, and neither party has yet to comment on the situation.
Experts point to various factors contributing to the rise of "therapy speak," with the coronavirus pandemic serving as a significant inflection point. Millennials and Generation Z, in particular, have embraced this language, as they have grown up with less stigma surrounding therapy. Millennials, often referred to as the "therapy generation," have been at the forefront of these discussions. Brady's screenshots sparked conversations among millennials about partners who have used "therapy speak" to manipulate or coerce them during relationships.
The Thin Line Between Self-Reflection and Manipulation: Jonah Hill Case Fuels Debate on Misused "Therapy Speak" in Relationships
Some Twitter users highlighted the intersection of "therapy speak," millennial men, and misogyny. It was noted that the language could be weaponized to win arguments, perpetuating patriarchal dynamics. While younger generations have been raised with more equality values, millennials, in particular, have often been exposed to systemic inequities that can shape their thinking. Consequently, some individuals may unconsciously employ "therapy speak" as a manipulation tactic due to these embedded beliefs.
According to Yahoo News, therapist Israa Nasir emphasized that although therapy is valuable for self-awareness, it is crucial to remember that "therapy speak" is intended for interactions between individuals and their therapists. Using this language outside of that context, especially during disagreements, can lead to defensiveness and potential misunderstandings. Emotional words may come across as controlling or manipulative rather than empathetic.
While "therapy speak" has become an integral part of social media discourse, experts advise couples to reflect on their usage. It is essential to consider personal accountability and self-reflection rather than using therapy as a means to police others. Nasir suggests that therapy remains valuable when focused on individual growth and self-awareness.
As conversations continue surrounding the potential harms of "therapy speak" in relationships, it is important to strike a balance between open discussions about mental health and respectful communication that does not seek to manipulate or control others.
