Proper communication with children is a complicated thing. Without bad intentions, many parents make the mistake of saying things that do more harm than good.
PARENTS posted an article about the things that parents should avoid saying to their kids. The list is comprised of phrases and sentences that might seem harmless on the outside but can actually negatively affect children's psychology.
First on the list is "great job." Parents usually use this phrase to complement their children when they do something good. However, this phrase might be too vague for children to understand what they did right. Being more specific with the complement might be a better idea. "Instead of 'Super game,' say, 'That was a nice assist. I like how you looked for your teammate'," the article shared.
Another thing not to say to kids is "you're okay". Parents use this phrase to comfort their children and to make them feel more relaxed. "Your job is to help him understand and deal with his emotions, not discount them," the article advised. Giving a hug, acknowledging what really happened and suggesting clear solutions are more effective ways to comfort a child. Parents should always remember to focus on their children's feelings rather than their own during conversations, according to APA.
"We can't afford that" is another thing never to say to your children. This phrase might give your kids the idea that you have no control over your finances. Telling kids that they cannot purchase a product because they are saving for something more important is a better way to teach them about saving and budgeting.
Lastly, parents should also avoid saying to their kids, "Be careful". The intention of parents when saying this phrase is to prevent their kids from suffering any harm or danger. However, this might be very distracting for kids trying to accomplish something and it can make them lose their focus. "If you're feeling anxious, move close to spot him in case he takes a tumble, being as still and quiet as you can," the article suggests.
Being a parent is never easy. You need to be mindful of your words and actions at all times; however, being one is really overwhelming and yes, priceless!
